Survival Journal - Final Paper

Since the experience of the past month has been a period of great learning for me, this paper will be an attempt to express the lessons I have learned from survival. Hopefully, it will be a summary of my thoughts and realizations as I have come to understand them during solo.

From the hardships and tests of endurance I learned much about my limitations. Strangely though, I learned more from observing others than myself. The first realization came when we left the little pond at the mouth of Horsethief during impact. I thought I had nearly reached my limits as we hiked that day and was extremely reluctant to continue on. Then as I was given the opportunity to help Melody and saw how tired she was, but how determinately she continued on I knew that I had not even come close to my limits of endurance. Throughout many of the tests of survival I have felt that my trials have not been as severe as those of others and each time I knew that if they had the courage to carry on surely, I must also.

One of the greatest lessons I have learned is the role that humility must play in my life. During group ex. it was humbling to see how well the girls groups performed together compared to the boys groups. An essential part of cooperating as a group is having the humility to put your trust in a leader and his decisions. We boys were too individualistic and did not function well as a group until we were humbled by becoming separated. Humility also is an essential element in a person’s relationship to the Lord. Only when a person has enough humility to know that he must depend upon the Lord instead of his own strength, can he earnestly strive to seek the help and guidance he needs. This lesson was not fully realized by me until the end of survival week when I felt sufficiently humble. I now have a better understanding of how much I must depend upon the Lord not only during times of hardship, but in all walks of life.

Survival has also taught me a lesson of appreciation for the sacred privilege of living in this beautiful creation. During solo I witnessed many wonders, from the graceful motions of deer and great hawks to the delicate scampering of field mice and insects. I often studied the canyon walls and remembered back to the other beautiful landscapes I had seen during the past month. I had time to appreciate their immensity and perhaps more fully understand how all these things are filling the “measure of their

creation”, as Sharon said. My eyes have beheld many of these marvels before, but I was not a part of them and could not fully appreciate them. It was as if I looked at them only through a picture frame until I had this chance to experience some of the joys and pains of living so intimately amongst them. For this added appreciation of the sacred blessing of earthly existence I am most grateful.

Some of the lessons I have learned are in relation to the goals I set, at the beginning of the course. One of my goals was to learn to base friendships upon the inner qualities of people rather than on outward appearances or superficial, less eternal qualities. From this experience of knowing hardships and suffering, of depending upon and living so closely with people I did not previously know, I feel I have learned how to more easily recognize the qualities upon which I want to base love for others. I am continually amazed at how much I can find to love in every single person I have met, during survival. I feel I have a greater understanding of Christ’s love for all his children and His commandment that we are to love others as we do ourselves. Another of my goals was to overcome my selfishness or to learn to love others to the point that I cared more about them than I did myself. From the many opportunities I had to serve others and give of myself I learned much about myself. I do not feel that I gave as much as I could or that I have overcome all my selfish desires, but I have learned much about where my faults lie and what I must do to correct them.

To summarize my feelings from survival, I have come to know a great peace within myself. It is not a peace such that what I am is entirely what want to be, but the lessons I have learned and the knowledge of myself I have gained do not disturb me, but confirm my faith in myself. I feel a sense of accomplishment at having endured hardships and having born them without faltering. I feel, too, that the direction I am going after survival will enable me to apply what I have learned toward improving

myself. I will be able to increase my faith in the Lord and learn to more fully love and serve others during my mission to Brazil. I am extremely grateful to have had this chance to learn so much that will serve as preparation for mission my experience.

As far as an instructor critique, I’m afraid I have little to say. Throughout the entire month of survival I never at any time felt a lacking on the part of the instructors. Their total dedication to their responsibility always seemed more than sufficient to me. The two instructors with which I had the most contact and whom I learned to love and appreciate the most were Fred and Russ. I feel that they both gave me much more than could give in return and that they both did an excellent job of teaching what they were. I will be eternally grateful to them and all the instructors for making survival the great experience it was to me.